Dear NHL

come on, now

Dear NHL,

For the love of god, won’t you hire a stylist for Ovechkin? Buy him a razor? Or at least pick him up a bottle of the sort of shampoo that’s made for oily hair?  The greatest talent in the league has got to be worth at least THAT much. We’re trying to improve the league’s image, remember?

*Note that I’m not suggesting you queer-eye him all up and make him kiss himself in the mirror or anything. But he’s gotta be able to do better than a rental tux that your average self-respecting 16 year old would turn down.